All I Ever Do is Wait... well, maybe that's not entirely true...

   KakNgah writes.

   KakNgah is waiting. And still waiting.

   It seems that all my life there has always been a period of waiting for something.

Waiting is not easy... but you still endure it for the sake of that anticipated moment
source

   I never really noticed it much during the early parts of my childhood and teenage years, but I began to do so after I completed SPM. First, there was the long wait for the results to come out. Then, when they finally did, there came the excitement of filling up application forms, deciding on which university to apply for and what courses and so on.

   Having decided that I wanted to become an English teacher... well, or at least at the time, wanting to take a course that had something to do with English,I put TESL as my first choice in the UPU form as well as the JPA/MARA form. Having done that, we sent the forms off and waited.

   Finally, the call for interviews came. I prepared for them and waited. Then the time for the interviews came. I went, performed(?) and went home. And waited. Then the results came out. I got accepted to Maktab Perguruan Perempuan Melayu. Yay!(?) We made preparations and waited. Registration day arrived and I went and registered.

   Finally, finally, finally, after what seemed like a series of endless periods of waiting, I started at college. Little did I know that the first day at maktab was just the start of another series of waits. All through 6 years, I waited for events to pass. I waited for exam days to arrive. I waited for results. (These two are the recurrinf episodes throughout my 6 years of training). Prepare. Wait. Passed it, fuhh! prepare. Wait. Passed it again. And so on and so forth.

   Now, after 6 years it has finally come to an end. Today, I waited for 5.00 p.m. to come. I waited for the moment when I could log in to IIUM's student portal and check my results for practicum as well as my cgpa. Well, I'm still waiting. They're not out yet. Grrr.

   At the same time, just like what I wrote about in an entry my other blog, I am also waiting for August, during which (hopefully!) i will know where I'll be sent to to teach. Yee-haa! yeah. It's May now. There are 25 days left in May. There are 30 days in June. 31 in July. I don't know the exact day for posting results. It could be the end of August.






























   .....

   ..............................................

....................................................................................

   .....................................................................................................................

   Sigh.

   Yet after all these time, I am beginning to realise that as horribly nerve-wrecking waiting for something can be, the moment it arrives- whether it's a good thing or a horrible one, you experience something else that makes up for those dreadfully long periods that you spent wondering. If it's a good thing that you waited for, and it arrived, you feel truly blessed and happy. If what you hoped for did not work out, you just begin another period of waiting. If it's something bad that you waited for, and it came to pass, you'd breathe a sigh of relief because it did come to pass and you no longer have to wait for it.

   As I grow older, I realise that the end of these 6 years is just a mark for the beginning of something else. I have grown,  definitely older, perhaps a little wiser. I realise that there are many more things to wait for, and as wearisome as waiting for things to arrive and happen can be, I hope I can endure it as well as I can. After all, when the Day Of Judgement comes, we'll all have to wait to be judged, so what is a little wait in the dunya compared to the long wait in the akhirah?

Is this the end?
source